August 25, 2011

The Meaning of Life

Do you ever think about how amazing life is? Sometimes (often) I lay awake at night in my estrogen-deprived stupor, waiting for sleep to return, and I think about how we're all so unique in who we are, how we look, what we think, the choices we make. But it's the thinking part that never ceases to amaze me - all those thoughts going around in our do we do that? Do other species have thoughts?
Problem with me is I can't stop those thoughts from ping-ponging around in my mind. Can you? Meditation is completely and utterly beyond me. Sometimes at night I try this trick of counting backwards from 300 to get back to sleep (doesn't work). You're supposedly concentrating so much on the numbers that it drives any other thoughts from your head. Hah! Not from mine. I'm an excellent multi-tasker. I can count backwards and still plan the next day's menu or ruminate over a conversation I had or figure out where to hang a picture or come up with my next blog post, all at the same time.
That said, it's all incredible to me and I love being alive. Even when life is sad, like when you lose the one you thought you'd grow old with, it's all part of the experience. So if life doesn't turn out the way you expect (does it for anyone?) it's still amazing and interesting and baffling and extraordinary.
What's the purpose? I don't know. Do I care? Not really - I just want to relish it, and the people in it, for as long as I can.

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