Movie Review: How Do You Know

How do you know if you should see How Do You Know? Just ask me.
NO.
Great cast: Reese Witherspoon who just lights up the screen, Paul Rudd who's adorably appealing, Owen Wilson who's fine, just not one of my favorites, and Jack Nicholson who's...well, Jack Nicholson. You can't fault the performances, they all did a great job with what they had to work with. Problem was the hugely inane, implausible script, and the direction.
Bad, bad, bad movie.
A waste of money, talent and MY TIME, even to review it.
Zero stars out of five for How Do You Know.

Do You Like Snow? Go to Frisco, Colorado

If you like snow this is the place to be, and here's the kicker...you get sunshine with your snow! Have you ever heard of Frisco? I hadn't. Not until my friends Cathy and Ted Johnson moved there. Ted tells me they get 300 days of sunshine per year. I don't know how many inches of snow they get every year but suffice it to say it's a shitload (that's a meteorological term).
Click on the photo below to see the album from my recent visit:

Frisco, Colorado - December 2010

The first few pictures are on the drive from Denver, where it was 57 degrees, up 9000 feet and directly west about 75 miles to Frisco. As we got higher we ran into snow and by the time we were about halfway there they had closed some of the roads. In Frisco it was around 20, and stayed that way while I was there with some snow every day.
It's a winter wonderland. We did some snow shoe'ing and hiking, went to Breckenridge and Georgetown. It was great. What the heck, if you don't have to shovel it what's not to like?

Important News Item

Hugh Hefner tweeted that he got engaged. Actually that's two pieces of news; one, that he tweets (really, he TWEETS???) and two, that he's going to marry a 24-year-old. Come on honey, I know you're young but you can add, can't you? He's 60 years older than you. No, he's not 60 years old, which would be bad enough - he was already 60 years old when you were born. That doesn't strike you as a little creepy?
Hef's quoted as saying that when he gave her the ring she burst into tears. Well of course she did. LOOK AT HIM.
Okay, okay, enough of that. I'm not going to make the inevitable diaper jokes or gold-digger jokes. I refuse to stoop to that level. I'm sure they're truly in love, they're soul-mates, they complete each other.
I'm sure Crystal's a Rhodes scholar. She's probably on the brink of finding a cure for erectile dysfunction. And she'll get back to work on it as soon as she finishes texting her BFFs, puts her clothes back on and stows her bunny ears.

Movie Review: Somewhere

This movie would more accurately be titled Soooooomewheeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrre because that's the length of most of the scenes. That's not to say I didn't like it because I did. And the more I think about it the more I like it. It's that kind of film. But be aware that it's not action-packed, it just moves along at its own pace (slooooow) giving us a glimpse into the life of an alienated actor and the daughter he occasionally spends time with. Steven Dorff is perfect as Johnny Marco, the actor, and Elle Fanning is unselfconsciously wonderful as his daughter.
Lost in Translation, Sophia Coppola's first film, is one of my favorites. After I saw it I wanted everyone to see it, so went again with some friends. It was shocking to me when my friend Lauren described it as "like watching paint dry." To me it was perfect. I could say unequivocally that Lauren should not see Somewhere. It may be too slow for some but it's Sophia Coppola and you have to spend time with her characters. Sometimes you almost feel like a peeping Tom. But it's worth it.
My favorite scene: the pole-dancing twins who bring their portable poles to Johnny's hotel room and do their dance with plastic smiles and zero passion. Very funny. The funniest part, tho, is when he falls asleep before they're finished. There's another falling-asleep scene but I won't spoil that one.
4-1/2 out of 5 stars for Somewhere.

Movie Review: The King's Speech

Who knew that Prince Edward and Wallis Simpson were such assholes? If this movie is to be believed, they were. Especially Edward who is portrayed as being very cruel to his brother, making fun of his stammering, even as an adult. I read about them when I was young and always thought it very romantic that he gave up the throne for her (stupid, but romantic) but who ever heard about "Bertie," the stammering king?

It's a very engaging story with wonderful performances by Colin Firth and Geoffrey Rush. Both could have easily overdone their roles but fortunately they didn't. Helena Bonham Carter doesn't have a huge part but when she's on screen she's amazing.
Five stars out of five for The King's Speech.
BTW, Eve Best and Guy Pearce are physically perfect as Prince Edward and Wallis Simpson.

Movie Review: The Black Swan

Don't go to this film thinking it's a dance movie. Oh, there's plenty of dance but that's really secondary to the central story which is a psychological thriller that blurs the line between reality and fantasy. It's hard to keep up sometimes, and sometimes hard to watch, but it's well-done and beautifully acted.
Natalie Portman is riveting as Nina whose dance obsession is driving her to the brink, or maybe what's making her crazy is her scary, symbiotic relationship with her mother, played by Barbara Hershey. More likely it's Hershey's creepy, surgically altered face that fuels her fears.
Mila Kunis is wonderfully sinister as the new young dancer who would do anything to replace Nina in the lead roll. Or would she? Maybe it's Nina's imagination. You be the judge.
Four out of five stars for The Black Swan.

Movie Review: The Fighter

I'm a sucker for the underdog-beats-the-odds kind of movie and especially when it's based on a true story. The Fighter is an exceptional film with lots of heart and great performances from people who are cast against type. Christian Bale is amazing as a burnt-out, crack-head ex-boxer and Mark Wahlberg is fabulous as his brother, although Wahlberg doesn't exactly look like he belongs in that family. Too GQ, but his performance makes you believe he could be. The most amazing was sweet and sparkly Amy Adams as a cynical, hardened bar maid who talks like a truck driver. Talk about casting against type. But it works. In spades. She is one of the best actors of our time, she has a truly engaging screen-presence, and that she could play this part realistically speaks to her talent. I can't imagine who read that script and said, "I know...Amy Adams!" as opposed to someone like Juliette Lewis, but it was a brilliant risk and it paid off.
Melissa Leo plays the mother of nine children (including the two boxers) and she's perfect as a trailer-trash, trash-talking, chimney-smoking mom who lives for the glory of her sons. The seven big-haired women (yes - SEVEN!) who play the sisters are mostly caricatures but their appearance is usually a funny bit that beautifully lightens the tension.
Five stars for this film with great writing, stellar performances and a lot of heart. A great film about the really stupid sport of boxing. Jeez, why would anyone want to do that?