Life In The Retirement Community

No, I didn't write this - I don't live in a retirement community. At least not yet, although we all know I more than meet the minimum age requirement. My best friend Judi Tepe does, and she writes a slice of life column for the Sun Day. I just cracked up at this article she wrote recently - although it garnered her a bunch of hate mail from some of the single women in the community.
It's great when you look at the world through laugh-colored eyes but when you don't...well, I guess you send hate mail to those who do.

When a single man comes to town…
By Judi Tepe 

I can say without reservation that one of the most exciting events in any over-55 community occurs when a single man moves in. The men on the block look at this happening as just another guy to borrow a ladder from, but the women view this as a challenge, and a major one at that.
It begins when the moving truck pulls up in front of the recently-sold house. Suddenly we women have gardening to do, windows needing to be washed, or are awaiting some important mail that requires at least several trips to the mailbox in one afternoon. The types of furniture unloaded and taken into the house is the first and usually major indicator of marital status. Experience has taught us that leather sofas and chairs, especially those in solid black or gray, almost certainly spell single male, commonly referred to as The SM. The lack of candy dishes, flower arrangements, chintz throw pillows, ANY pillows, side tables, boxes labeled “holiday decorations,” or a Kitchen Aide stand mixer, well, we women already know what our mission is going to be.After a reasonable amount of time has passed and our new neighbor has set up his garage and had the cable guy out, we begin to seriously assess the situation. This particular assessment is done on a scale from 1-5. I’ll explain.
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