2. You go out to dinner with a bunch of friends, you all pull out glasses to read the menu, and then you complain about how noisy it is.
3. You and your spouse/s.o./friend are trying to resolve an argument you had last night and neither of you can remember what it was about (alcohol does not help this condition).
4. Your friend has a 'boy toy' and he has an AARP card.
5. You pass the Escada store on Michigan Ave. that is no longer there and by the time you get home (50 yards) you forget to call your friend Lauren to tell her.
6. Your email address has @aol.com at the end.
7. You think you're stylin' in your shorts and jog bra and then you bend down to tie your running shoes and a roll of flesh plops over the band of your shorts (and doing sit-ups til your eyes pop out does not help this condition).
8. You look in the mirror and see your mother (I know that's so trite but really...wait 'til it happens to you).
9. You have a party and everyone leaves by 9:30.
10. You start sentences with, "Kids today..."
Finish the sentence:
You know you're old when _______________________________.